Guide to downsizing your wedding guest list

It’s easy for your guest list to balloon out of control as you list all the people you would love to invite to your wedding. We help you cut down your wedding guest list with these simple suggestions.

Prioritise

Every couple starts by listing all the people they want to see at their wedding. The next step is to prioritise those people. Think about who is most important to you and your partner. This could be close family and friends or people who have been particularly supportive of your relationship. Place these people at the top of your list.

With your target guest number in mind, start removing anyone who is not essential. This could be anyone you don’t talk to regularly – co-workers, neighbours or acquaintances you haven’t seen in years.

Making your guest list adults-only can help to reduce numbers. Or you could eliminate Plus-Ones. Or don’t invite your parents’ friends. You’ll know best how each of these options will be greeted and how you’ll need to navigate them.

Small ceremony, large party

Inviting a small proportion of guests to the ceremony is another way to keep your guest list down. Then after the reception (including the sit-down meal, which is often the most expensive part) you can hold a bigger party, still at the same venue, and invite your wider circle of friends and family.

Contact your VIPs early

By reaching out to individuals you absolutely have to have at your wedding, you can confirm the date works for them. If it doesn’t (there will always be clashes), you’ll know how many additional guests you can still invite.

Virtual guests

We’re all well versed in Zoom and Teams these days, so it’s not beyond the realms of reasonableness to live-stream your wedding and ask some guests to join virtually. Make sure your virtual guests know all the necessary login details, and it’s well worth taking the time to explain why they haven’t been invited in person.

Consider a micro wedding

If you are unable to whittle down your master list, consider having a smaller wedding. This could mean having an intimate ceremony with only close family and friends or having a destination wedding or an elopement that only a select few can attend.

Be honest and make it personal

If you do have to uninvite people from your wedding, do it sooner rather than later, as this can help to avoid hurt feelings. Most people understand that weddings can be expensive affairs. You could suggest alternative ways to celebrate with them at a later stage, for example with a dinner after the honeymoon, or drinks after the big day.